Friday, July 01, 2005

Patching Unmotivation

I'm having a hard time patching Joey.

I'm the one having the hard time, not Joey.

He had his surgery in April, and I didn't patch him the week before or the week after. Then I started patching him again. He had to get used to it all over again. And I kinda feel like it's harder for me this time. I know I need to patch him. And I do patch him. But I find myself letting him take it off before the four hours is over. Or I find that on a busy day, I just neglect it completely. I just feel exhausted by it because I know how much he hates it. We'll be having a normal day and having a good time playing or running errands, and then it will occur to me..."oh yeah, I still have to patch him". Yes, I know it's a small thing compared to things that other people go through. I've just got to reach down inside myself and find that motivation because his little eye needs it. I cannot be so selfish. He needs it. Don't get me wrong...he does patch regularly...but like I said...I decrease the times on some days. And I used to give him Sundays off...now I give him Saturday AND Sundays off. I dont want to look back and regret that I was so neglectful about this. So I WILL find the motivation to be more faithful in this small task. Last time I had a hard time with patching, I asked some people to pray for me. Maybe that is what I need to do now. Ask God to help me be stronger and more faithful in this thing that He has entrusted me to take care of. Yes, that's what I'll do. I feel stronger already as I think about His strength. I feel His strength more when I am at the end my own. Thank you Lord for helping me take care of my little boy.