Orange Circles

Joey was supposed to start 1st grade today, but yesterday he started puking and so, he is home today.

Last night as he was going to bed, he mentioned that he saw "orange circles" when he blinked. I asked him which eye, and he pointed to his left eye, which is his "Coats" eye. I immediately began to worry and then finally pulled out Dr. T's card, which had his cell phone number on it. I called (it was about 9pm) and apologized for calling him at home AND for calling at that hour. I explained to him what Joey had told me and asked if it was something I should be concerned about. He said he would have to take a look at him and see what was going on. He wouldn't be in the office today, as he would be in surgery all day. But told me that I could go to the office first thing Thursday. I called the office this morning, and they told me to come at around 8 or 8:15. So I'm taking him in. It's about an hour and half drive from here, so I am not looking forward to it, but I think this is important enough not to wait til next week when Dr. T will be in the nearer office. I will also admit that I have already been on the internet scaring myself about this.

I will also say this...since Joey was diagnosed a couple of years ago, I've struggled with anxiety while driving. It's gotten better since I have figured out that it is anxiety, but I still fight it. Today, I prayed to God to be with me and give me strength. I told Him that I just felt too weak to fight the battle and that He would just have be with me and help me and give me the energy to fight it. Let me backtrack a little - a couple of weeks ago, I started to memorize Psalm 143, and when I feel anxious, I begin to pray it and it helps me a lot. I am memorizing it slowly, adding a verse at a time. So today, I picked up the bible and looked for this psalm to add to what I have memorized so far, when my eye was just drawn to another psalm on the page, and in particular, this verse:

Blessed be the Lord, my rock.
Who trains my hands for war and my fingers for battle.
He is my lovingkindness and my fortress;
my strong tower and my deliverer;
my shield and the One who I take refuge in.

I wont say that I miraculously felt peace, but I believe that He put a weapon in my hand to use when the need arises. Since the bible says that the Word of God is a sword, then I will wave my sword (recite the Word) in my battle against the anxiety.